dark | side | thursday | thirtyfour

Do you need, desire or crave a new challenge?  Are you open to sharing your dark side?   Then read on.


Do you have a dark side?

AJT_6650-EditOr, think you may have one. Or indeed worry that you might have one. Or, for that matter, worry that you don’t and would like one? If so,  join me here each week for dark | side | thursday.

Over a period of 52 weeks, I am writing a story. A dark story that will unfold as the weeks pass. Each Thursday, at 13:00 UTC, I will post a new chapter. Each chapter will be exactly 500 words long, and will be accompanied by a photograph. You can catch up on the story so far by clicking here on dark | side | thursday

Share your dark side?

I invite you to join me either by writing your own dark story, week by week, or, if that is too much, by dropping by, now and then, perhaps when the mood suits you or, perhaps, when it doesn’t, and by sharing a photograph, poem or a suitably dark piece of prose. To cross over to dark | side | thursday create your post, tag it dark side thursday and link to it by clicking on the dark | side | thursday badge below, where you can also find all the contributions so far. Or you can simply share your link in the comments section of my weekly post. And, should the mood take you, you can add the badge to your post.


dark | side | thursday | thirtyfour

Reality.

He saw her reality. But not her. She was not there. Perhaps she never had been. Not in any real, or meaningful, sense.

He was alone, and in pain.

And he had not the slightest idea what was happening to him or why. His recollections of recent events were scrambled, incoherent. Flashing lights, sirens, her warm body, what she had done to and with his body, that hellish impact.  Fragmented memories from far away, fragments long buried that had bubbled to the surface.  The button. Tied to the morphine drip, he had kept pushing the button, long past that point when any pretence that he could control the flow had long passed. His teeth had hurt. Not his teeth, the space, he realised, where three had been wrenched, torn, out of their place in his face.

She had gone. This time, he thought, for good. Or bad, or, whatever. He didn’t really feel able to think, let alone assess the consequences of recent events.

He did want a shot. Some internal warming. Precious chance of that just now.

The room in which he lay was white. Everything was white. No relief from the white. He felt stronger. Relatively at least. He rolled, with some difficulty on to his right side, used his arm as support and pushed himself (slowly) upright. Most parts of his body sending signals to his failing brain that this was not the best decision he took this day. Ignoring the signs, the strains, he sat, upright. Took the glass that rested on the white table that sat next to the bed. Lifted the glass to his mouth, with abandon drank deep long gulps of cold water. His head span, heart beating faster.

He looked around the room. Apart from the bed, white frame, white sheets, white pillows and a white table, the room was featureless. He could see no door, no window, no cabinets, no life-saving machinery. He was wearing a single white tunic of soft material that covered his entire body. Only then did he realise this. The parts of his body not covered in white were restricted to his eyes, nostrils, mouth. The rest covered, enveloped in white.

This made him stop for a moment. To think.

He moved again, so that he sat on the edge of the bed. Placed his hands, palm down, on either side of his body and pushed himself upright.

He was surprised that this did not hurt him as much as he had feared. His body felt light, ethereal.

He walked. No. It felt more like floating. Floated towards one side of the white room. It was hard to tell where the room ended and the wall started, maybe there was no such division.

He paused. For a moment, he remembered her. The feel of her warm body. The touch of her fingers on him. Her warm wet lips.

Reality. He needed to get a grip.

He reached out his fingers toward the white wall.

Reality.


The portal to dark | side | thursday opened on the twenty first day of may in the year twenty hundred and fifteen and will remain open for fifty two weeks.

thirtyfour | fiftytwo

poetry | 101 | rehab | place

You seem to understand my questions, but your answers make no sense to me.
That’s typical of life, isn’t it?
― Alasdair Gray


Welcome to this week’s Poetry 1o1 Rehab Prompt.

My prompt this week is PLACE.

Once again, I skate on thin ice, writing (perhaps) from the view of a pigeon, or (mibby) the observer of a pigeon, once (or twice) removed.

So, this week, write a poem to describe what it means to have a place that makes you feel safe, or a place that once did, and does nae longer.

And in doing so, show us your place, and space.


A space, and place,
in which he,
became,
so easily, dis-placed

and,

(mibby) re-placed
even, before
he, (ever) knew, his
place.

No,
grace.
Deep,
space.
No,
trace.

That face,
re-membered up,
above, in
that
(elevated) place, a
cheery,
wave, from that
(terrace), and
walking away,
thinking that place
was a good
place.

To be.

A pigeon, sitting,
on
a lamp post.

poetry | 101 | rehab |  place


You can link to your post in response to today’s prompt by leaving a comment on my post and / or by clicking on the poetry | 101 | badge below and leaving a link.

And you can also tag your post with Poetry 101 Rehab so that it shows up in the WordPress Reader.

Please feel free to copy and paste the badge across to your own post and your own site 🙂

2015_06_19_09504

More information can be found on my poetry | 101 | rehab page.

 

project 365 mobile | mono | square | week 30

On Sunday, 14 June 2015, I launched my Project 365.

You can see all the images as they are posted, each day, to the mobile | mono | square album on my flickr account.

You can also browse all of my weekly updates ,which are posted each Sunday, here .

Desktopmms-Edit

weight(less)

The body, she says, is subject to the force of gravity. But the soul is ruled by levity, pure
― Saul Bellow


a lifetime ago, this hand held

a new life, eyes barely open

(and more since, after that first new

life)

a weight lifted

a weight forever to carry

(whatever)

and now

that new life

will soon

also bring (its own) new life

the weight will lift again

and once more

become heavier,

and lighter


for wordpress weekly photo challenge – weight(less)

see also weightless on belgianstreets

 

poetry | 101 | rehab | fem

I hate men who are afraid of women’s strength

― Anaïs Nin


Welcome to this week’s Poetry 1o1 Rehab Prompt.  The first of 2016.

My prompt this week is FEM.

I have tried, and, perhaps in doing so, skated on thin ice, to write from a perspective different than my own. I may, or may not, have achieved that. No doubt, I will find out soon enough.

So, this week, write a poem to describe what it means to be feminine, in your world, or in some other (part of the) world; or, take a different spin from the post and write about something from the perspective of another person, or, if the fancy takes you, something not even human.

And in doing so. Show no mercy.


I am.

Like you.

I am.
I have two legs, two arms,
two eyes.
A brain (with two sides),
just like you.

(more)

I want, and need,
like you, more than,
you.
I can do, all you can,
and more.

(than you can)

I am,
woman.
I can.
I do.
I need,
no rescue.

(by you)

I need.
No.
Mercy.

I am,
human

(and you?)

poetry | 101 | rehab | fem


You can link to your post in response to today’s prompt by leaving a comment on my post and / or by clicking on the poetry | 101 | badge below and leaving a link.

And you can also tag your post with Poetry 101 Rehab so that it shows up in the WordPress Reader.

Please feel free to copy and paste the badge across to your own post and your own site 🙂

2015_06_19_09504

More information can be found on my poetry | 101 | rehab page.

 

project 365 mobile | mono | square | week 29

On Sunday, 14 June 2015, I launched my Project 365.

You can see all the images as they are posted, each day, to the mobile | mono | square album on my flickr account.

You can also browse all of my weekly updates ,which are posted each Sunday, here .

Desktopmms-Edit

circle

What I was chasing in circles must have been the tail of the darkness inside me.
― Haruki Murakami, After the Quake

Happy New Year to all my readers, I wish you all that you wish for, in 2016, and beyond.


for wordpress weekly photo challenge – circle

and my opening shot for Lucile’s Photo 101 Rehab for 2016

*shot with nikon d700 and nikkor 70-200mm f/4 lens at 135mm, f/4 1/125sec and ISO280*

dark | side | thursday | thirtythree

Do you need, desire or crave a new challenge?  Are you open to sharing your dark side?   Then read on.

atownend_2014_11_11_1105


Do you have a dark side?

Or, think you may have one. Or indeed worry that you might have one. Or, for that matter, worry that you don’t and would like one? If so,  join me here each week for dark | side | thursday.

Over a period of 52 weeks, I am writing a story. A dark story that will unfold as the weeks pass. Each Thursday, at 13:00 UTC, I will post a new chapter. Each chapter will be exactly 500 words long, and will be accompanied by a photograph. You can catch up on the story so far by clicking here on dark | side | thursday

Share your dark side?

I invite you to join me either by writing your own dark story, week by week, or, if that is too much, by dropping by, now and then, perhaps when the mood suits you or, perhaps, when it doesn’t, and by sharing a photograph, poem or a suitably dark piece of prose. To cross over to dark | side | thursday create your post, tag it dark side thursday and link to it by clicking on the dark | side | thursday badge below, where you can also find all the contributions so far. Or you can simply share your link in the comments section of my weekly post. And, should the mood take you, you can add the badge to your post.

AJT_6650-Edit


dark | side | thursday | thirtythree

His teeth hurt.

And he could see nothing. Not a damned thing.

Nothing.

Some good things. The lights had (finally) stopped flashing. The siren was (at least) silenced.

For now.

His stomach churned, he felt the ground slither and shift beneath him. Snakes twisting, hissing, embracing. Rehearsing.

He ached. Wanted. Needed.

Lusted.

Fragmented memories, teenaged walks. Darkened banks, distended rivers. Fumbled encounters with unknown territories. Soft, warm, cotton, elastic, plastic. Ridges, curves. Swollen, stolen. Stubble and trouble. Warm, wet and pressed. Repressed, depressed. No, yes. Please, and no. Crevices, false moist premises. Fingers entwined. Breathless promises, untouched premises. Unknown provinces. Breathless. Hard pressed fences, no defences.

Dark wet endings.

Fear and guilt. Tumbling, spinning. Mind unfurling. Twisting, turning.

Darkness gathering.

Nothing.

Water rushing. Trunks extending. Leaves unfurling. Shadows passing. Fingers, lips and tongues. Melting, melding. Branches poking, spreading.

Snow piling up in front of him. Snowflakes, she gave, he takes, she fakes.

Nothing.

Dials descending. Counting and measuring. Time approaching, receding, rushing, crashing. Time compressing, extending, unwinding, dilating, disappearing. Unfurling.

Nausea rising.

Spinning, twisting, retching, heaving.

Nothing.

Faces swirling in the mist. Approaching and receding.

Voices, echoing, booming, fading. Fractured. Silenced.

Twisting, a sharp pain pulled at his arm. Needle embedded. Fluid flowing. Pain pushed back. Clarity crystallising, crumbling. Push the button.

Nothing.

Tight white cotton. Curve and crevice. Hidden, bidden, unforgiven. Warm wet lips. Tight embraces. Hidden faces. Dark desires. Dark flowing rivers. Twisted branches. Elastic, plastic, closure.

Nothing.

Nausea rising.

His teeth hurt.

A lot.

Nausea rising.

Lights flashing, sirens screaming. Sirens taunting. Taut warm bodies. Beckoning. And then, the reckoning.

Cotton. White. Tight. Curves and swellings. Hidden promises, forbidden premises. White. Swollen. White and smooth. Stubbled trouble. Shaven, brazen.

Nausea rising.

Nothing.

His teeth hurt.

A lot.

Push the button.

Nausea rising.

Blink.

His eyes, open. Rivers frozen. Love left frozen. Give me a dozen. Why so cold, not so old. Bold, sold. Shoes un-soled. Left untold.

Nausea rising.

pushthebuttonpushthebuttonpushthebutton.

Nothing.

Eyes blinked open. Morphine seeping, through plastic tubing. Bloating his arm, warming, pain receding. Floating, fear receding. All receding. No preceding.

Dry mouthed, he reached out. Cold glass. Rolling over. Crisp white cotton. Sheets not shrieks. Shaking hands, cold wet (water) gasping, fetching. Life giving.

Nothing.

His teeth hurt.

Less. Than before.

Nothing.

Eyes open. Blink. Think.

His teeth hurt. His face hurt. He hurt. Everywhere. Faded memories. Washed up. Tied up.

Nothing.

His teeth no longer hurt.

Now he lay still. Seconds passed. Minutes. Hours. Days. Weeks. An eternity in the sweep, of a second hand.

Second hand dreams. Long lost dreams. Fading fast. Taught white cotton. Curved promise, false premise.

Push the button.

Eyes wide open.

Hurting less.

Gathering memory. Firm if fanciful. Must not lust. Grasping memory.

Push the button.

Warming. Memory storming. Flashing lights, screeching sounds and sirens calling. Falling. Breaking. Warm, wet, bodies joining.

Push the button.

Nothing.

Push the button.

Falling.

Eyes wide open.

He saw her then. Saw her,

reality.


The portal to dark | side | thursday opened on the twenty first day of may in the year twenty hundred and fifteen and will remain open for fifty two weeks.

thirtythree | fiftytwo

dark | side | thursday | thirtytwo

Do you need, desire or crave a new challenge?  Are you open to sharing your dark side?   Then read on.

2015_09_26_04163-Edit


Do you have a dark side?

Or, think you may have one. Or indeed worry that you might have one. Or, for that matter, worry that you don’t and would like one? If so,  join me here each week for dark | side | thursday.

Over a period of 52 weeks, I am writing a story. A dark story that will unfold as the weeks pass. Each Thursday, at 13:00 UTC, I will post a new chapter. Each chapter will be exactly 500 words long, and will be accompanied by a photograph. You can catch up on the story so far by clicking here on dark | side | thursday

Share your dark side?

I invite you to join me either by writing your own dark story, week by week, or, if that is too much, by dropping by, now and then, perhaps when the mood suits you or, perhaps, when it doesn’t, and by sharing a photograph, poem or a suitably dark piece of prose. To cross over to dark | side | thursday create your post, tag it dark side thursday and link to it by clicking on the dark | side | thursday badge below, where you can also find all the contributions so far. Or you can simply share your link in the comments section of my weekly post. And, should the mood take you, you can add the badge to your post.

AJT_6650-Edit


dark | side | thursday | thirtytwo

She smiled, and laughed.

A twisted girlish grin, lopsided, her dark eyes widening, her lips, moist, pinched and puckered, as if to kiss. But kiss she did not. She leaned over him, lips brushing his with a quick upward flick, leaving him wanting more, his mouth open, ready to taste her, even bound as he was. Needing. Aching for more. Of her. All of her.

The sirens did not abate. The lights flashed. The road ahead endless. He strained against the ties that bound him.

He felt her body hover over his, his arms pinned and absent. He felt her hot breath on his face, felt her sliding up and over his prone and strapped down body, belly rubbing over his, soft thighs spreading, squeezing, her breast soft, teasing, taunting him. Slim, delicate, fingers stroking and caressing the cracked contours of his face, her body pinning him, enfolding him, devouring him.

Memories of a cold white hospital cell. That time, long ago. Their bodies shared for brief moments. Given and taken. Wanted and feared. The pain they shared. And all that followed.

The dust. The blood. The fear.

Her lips grazed his, flickered and fluttered, never quite connecting, never lingering, her tongue licking and teasing. Again, and again. He ached. Her body rocking against his, a perverse parody of passion.

Unable to move, his body straining, hardening yet withdrawing, she took him and made him hers. Pain flashed along his arm. Light fading, vision blurring and darkening as the dwindling tunnel of his vision squeezed and contracted around him in time with the practised, clinical, movements of her body. His breath fading as he felt snow begin to pile up and cover his prone body. Cold, wet, snow. Fanciful crystalline flakes, tumbling and floating in front of his eyes, iridescent and flickering. He struggled to breathe. Her cold, dark, empty eyes looking into, and through, his, as he felt her tighten around him. And, all the time, sirens screaming, lights flashing, snow flakes falling, gathering, smothering, stifling him. Her eyes grew darker and receded, he heard her cry out, with the voice that had haunted him for so long.

He felt the pressure of her body recede. His wanting to rise up off the boards to which he was strapped,to follow her, to feel her lithe body pressed firm against him, to feel her hot breath on his face, her wet mouth pressed against his.

The impact was intense.

Sudden.

Brutal.

The sirens stopped. Dead.

His body, and the boards to which he was strapped, slammed into the tarmac with a fierce wet smack. He couldn’t help connecting this with the sound her body made against his as she had rhythmically soared and swooped above him.

He tumbled, over and over, feeling, far away, his face tearing as his body slammed into and across the empty wet road. The ambulance, a mangled blazing wreck, smashed against the razor-wired concrete.

Lights flashing blue and red.

Not again. He thought.


The portal to dark | side | thursday opened on the twenty first day of may in the year twenty hundred and fifteen and will remain open for fifty two weeks.

thirtytwo | fiftytwo